Welcome to GSL

This login is for the website administrators.

Please use the member login link in the main navigation bar to access the members sections.

Member Login
Lost your password?

DANGEROUS FUGITIVE IN CUSTODY: Devin fought the law… and it didn’t go so well for him

September 29, 2022

Life’s loser Devin Krueger fought the law.  And the law pushed his face into the dirt and cuffed and stuffed him.

In an update from a couple of stories (original, update) over the last few days, we detailed how Devin Krueger and some of his pals are suspected of victimizing many folks in southwestern Illinois.  In fact, cops believe he was that area’s wannabe little bad boy ringleader for months.

He was taken into custody early this morning – with tender, loving care – by the US Marshals.  Faced with overwhelming force, he didn’t resist too violently.  Not violently enough to get rapidly and promiscuously perforated by the law.

According to Two Rivers Crime Stoppers, a tip was not responsible for bringing this violent criminal into custody.

It’s too bad he can’t spend the next twenty years breaking rocks in the hot sun.  I suppose if he’s convicted, keeping him in a cage is the best we can hope for to help keep the productive in society safe and sound from his habitual criminal tendencies.  It’ll also help keep him from reproducing.

3 Responses to DANGEROUS FUGITIVE IN CUSTODY: Devin fought the law… and it didn’t go so well for him

  1. Gipper's Ghost on September 29, 2022 at 7:29 pm

    He can’t get pregnant in prison? Didn’t Diaper Joe tell us men can get pregnant?

  2. Jon Talkemeyer on September 30, 2022 at 6:19 am

    With all the sentence enhancers in play, 20 years isn’t out of the question. That probably leads to an actual served term of 8 to 10 years. But for a skinny little 20 something from small town bfe, it’s probably going to be a looong 10 years in there with Bubba… Soap on a rope will soon be on his wish list..

  3. Freddy on October 2, 2022 at 9:30 am

    Good thing our SAFE-T Act hasn’t kicked in yet. Otherwise Devin wouldn’t be held at all. I am predicting street justice come next year.