Police investigate the scene where two were shot here, one fatally, at 5800 w. Augusta, Thursday, June 12, 2014.  (E. Jason Wambsgans/Chicago Tribune)

Chicago is brimming with good news of late.

Starting with the weekend’s body count – only three people were killed in last weekend’s criminal violence orgy!

Almost three dozen more were shot though, according to our friends over at Hey Jackass – Illustrating Chicago’s Values.  You can’t win them all when you keep guns out of the hands of good guys for the most part.

Of course, we will take this opportunity to point out there were far too few Father’s Day family get-togethers in Chicago and that a lack of nuclear families is a part of Chicago’s violence problem.

Maybe Chicago should pay the NRA to host their annual convention and meetings in Chicago and attract 70,000 good guys with guns to the city for a weekend?  Nope, that won’t work because Illinois won’t recognize any other states’ carry permits.

In still more good news, Chicago politicians crowed that there were no serious incidents of criminal violence on Chicago’s “Safe Passage” routes last school year.

What they didn’t say is that they only considered 0600-0900 hours when the “Safe Passage” routes to schools were implemented – and the hundreds, if not thousands of paid “Safe Passage” route monitors who were employed, along with all of the city workers pulled off their jobs to be glorified babysitters for a third or more of their workday.

Also, nevermind that violent crime between six and nine a.m. is practically non-existent, in part because all of the goblins are sound asleep.

We must give credit where credit is due:  The “leaders” of Chicago are masterful at spinning lemons into lemonade!



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